Batman: Arkham Asylum Review

I am always leery when I load any licensed game into my console, especially when that license happens to be one my favorite.  Nearly every time a publisher releases a video game based on a beloved franchise, it is an obvious attempt at a cash-in, devoid of any creative merit.  I am (incredibly) pleased to tell you that this is not the case with Batman:  Arkham Asylum.  This game delivers on every level, and I do not hesitate to place it among the best licensed video games of all time.  It is certainly the best game based on a superhero that I have ever played in my twenty years of hardcore gaming.

Note:  This review is of the Playstation 3 version of the game.  Incidentally, I know this game was released nearly a year and a half ago, but I just got around to playing it so THERE ;{o


The game begins with a cinematic cutscene depicting Joker's latest trip to Arkham Asylum in the back of the Batmobile.  The playable escort that follows serves as a catalyst for the action to come, with Batman expressing to Gordon his uneasiness about the lack of difficulty involved in apprehending Joker this time.  Joker, of course, breaks free of his bonds, and Batman's worries become a reality as it is revealed that Joker has planned his capture to coincide with the (un)planned transfer (thanks to a fire) of numerous sane Blackgate Prison inmates--many in Joker's gang--to the asylum.  So begins the intricately planned night of mayhem.  You play as Batman--with all the gadgets you've come to know and love (and then some)--methodically making your way around Arkham Island to uncover and halt Joker's latest plot to harm the citizens of Gotham.  You do all of the things you would expect to do as the Dark Knight--except pilot vehicles--although they do make memorable appearances, and the game does not suffer in the least from the exclusion of their playability.

Gameplay is experienced through a classic-yet-perfected third-person over-the-shoulder perspective and consists of combat, stealth combat, and exploration with a dash of puzzle-solving thrown in for good measure.  If you are any type of gamer who enjoys action-adventure, you will enjoy this game whether you like Batman or not (but, frankly, who doesn't?).  The hand-to-hand combat involves an easy-to-learn-yet-hard-to-master combo system that allows the Caped Crusader to dispense of numerous foes simultaneously with various strikes, throws, stuns, and counters, with the occasional Batarang thrown for a quick multiplier.  Chaining your combos fluidly without being hit or breaking them yourself rewards greater experience, which is used to purchase upgrades for the Batsuit and other familiar equipment frequently used by the World's Greatest Detective.

The detective aspect of Bruce Wayne's character is not lost in this interactive incarnation, a decision on the part of the developers for which I am extremely grateful.  By pressing the L2 button, players can switch to "Detective Mode," changing the already dark and foreboding landscape to a much darker and monochromatic environment, with points of interest highlighted in bright colors.  Items of interest include any evidence trail (such as specific DNA or fingerprints) Batman might be following at the time, interview tapes with Arkham inmates that help flesh out the characters and story, or trophies and puzzles that the Riddler has placed all over the island to challenge your wits and dedication to exploration.  The obsessive-compulsive collector in me spent quite a bit of time in Detective Mode searching for all of the little extras.  While they do provide some substantial XP (experience points for you non-nerds), the real reward is the unlockable content:  character biographies that give information about tons of characters in the Dark Knight's canon--not just those featured in the game--and new levels in the Challenge Mode--the other portion of the game that adds quite a bit of replay value to the title as a whole.

The Challenge Mode puts the player into timed combat or stealth scenarios that force the player to eliminate a designated number of Joker's thugs.  The goal of the combat challenges is to create the largest chain combos possible to earn high scores that place your PS3 gamer tag on the online leaderboards.  The objective of points is the same in the stealth (or Predator) challenges, but the points are earned by covertly dispersing of the targets quickly and efficiently.  The Dark Knight can use his trusty grappling hook to climb atop vantage points, allowing him to drop down quietly from above and perform silent takedowns or hang his victims from the ceiling.  Batman can also crouch and crawl through air ducts to sneak up behind opponents and perform silent takedowns.  The stealth aspects of the gameplay are just as intuitive as the rest of the game.  The developers have captured the character of Batman quite well.  Enemies become frightened when their cohorts start dropping and/or disappearing, and they are frightened when he springs upon them unexpectedly as well.  The advantage of fear and the opportunity it provides in combat is the main reasoning behind Bruce Wayne's adoption of the bat visage and to ignore that fact would have been extremely detrimental.

The creators also captured the essence of the rest of the cast remarkably well.  The writing is spot-on.  It helps that it was penned by prolific comic writer Paul Dini.  The fact that many of the voice actors from my personal favorite Dark Knight cartoon, Batman:  The Animated Series, have returned to reprise their roles--including the legendary Mark Hamill in the pivotal role of Joker--help the story succeed as well.  Incidentally, this is definitely not a detective story for your children.  This game was created for those fans, like myself, who grew up loving the franchise, and have since done just that--grown up.  There is plenty of swearing but nothing that would be censored from prime-time television, and the female characters are dressed quite scantily; however, the fact that this game is for adults rests in the more darkly sinister and disturbing content presented in the dialogue and images.  Whether Killer Croc is discussing eating and eventually shitting out his murder victims or the Riddler is telling a joke that ends in the dismemberment of a baby, it is obvious that this game is geared toward an adult audience.  Some of the visuals, especially the parts of the game involving Scarecrow and his hallucinogenic toxin, disturbed even me, a horror movie/comic/book buff.

I really can't say enough good things about this game.  I enjoyed every minute of the fifteen or so hours I put into it (which earned me about 90% completion--I didn't search out every easter egg, but I did find many).  From the large number of skirmishes allowing me to own unskilled armed goons, to the boss encounters (Bane, Killer Croc, Poison Ivy, Harley Quinn, Joker, etc.), to just exploring the island as the Dark Knight, entering the Bat Cave or grappling to the top of the clock tower to glide for hundreds of meters, the game is a fanboy's dream come true.

I am anxiously awaiting the sequel:  Batman:  Arkham City.  

Episode VI: Return of the Fat Guy

After a long hiatus, I have decided to return to the blogosphere.  There are multiple directions I want to go with this creation, and I can't decide on which, so I am going to go in all of them.  I hope I don't disappoint or alienate any of the tens of readers I have, but I have an eclectic taste.  I am a student of multiple subjects and disciplines:  composition; pedagogy; gaming--poker, mostly, but I still love video games and tabletop RPGs; comedy (in all its forms); literature; film; history; beer and coffee--I group them because they are both beverages, and both require the same fine attention to detail in their respective crafting and appreciation; and puzzle-solving--not a recent fascination but one that has been reawakened since I became interested in speedcubing (solving a Rubik's cube or similar puzzle as quickly as possible).  I approach each of these interests almost academically, with a hunger for knowledge that nearly matches the hunger I have for Lion's Choice (which is quite substantial).  It's no wonder I decided to become an educator.  I can't get enough of being a student.

So I hope having some direction, especially multiple ones, will allow me to catalyze the creative lethargy that tends to pervade my leisure time.  My personal and professional life are rather demanding, but I am not complaining.  I love my life, and I wouldn't have it any other way.  I hope to crank out more than few posts before this next semester starts, when I will inevitably slow down again.  My goal is to avoid the standstill at which I arrived this previous semester.  With that said, I must leave you--but only to decide upon the topic of my next post.  For now, I'm all in.

Note:  Many Bothans died to bring you this information.

An Odd Observation

Even though I'm somewhat of a tech junkie, I'm not really into the notion of being constantly "plugged in." Like everything else, gadgets (games, phones, mp3 players, computers, etc.) should be used in moderation despite their convenience or entertainment value. I find it alarming to see groups of people in the same room not saying a word to each other but every one of them on a cell phone or other such device.

With that being said, as I wait for Skylar to get out of chorus practice, there is a bit of variety in the activities (or lack thereof) in which the other parents are partaking. I am the only one with a computer (having just finished commenting on a plethora of student papers), and there is one woman on a Blackberry. This is out of a sampling of about twenty parents/guardians, ranging in age from 25 to 65. There are two tables of four parents involved in conversation. The one nearest me is having the worst sort of political discussion--the one where everyone quotes bumper-sticker slogans and all the rest agree emphatically with the speaker's pithy wisdom. I'm not sure about the other table. No matter what it is (even if it is as abhorred as the one I am being subjected to), at least they are engaging in conversation. What disturbs me about the rest of the people in the room is that they are doing NOTHING. They sit and stare at whatever enters their field of vision. I sit in a place of higher learning and do not see even one book, and this depresses me.

Doesn't anyone read anymore? Sure people buy books (according to the New York Times Bestseller list, a lot of them), but are they reading them or just setting them out for their friends to see in their living rooms? I don't blame television, the internet, Google, Macintosh, or Republicans or Democrats for what I see. I only blame the people themselves. I don't know what's worse: the people who don't do much outside of what technology can offer them or the people who simply don't do much. Is it apathy or ignorance in either case, or both? These are questions to ponder, but not for me. Not now. Now I plan on calling my wife and laughing about the Larry David look-alike dressed entirely in denim that just walked into the room.

Until next time...I'm all in.

Other Lines

In the desert

I saw a creature, naked, bestial,

who, squatting upon the ground,

Held his heart in his hands,

And ate of it.

I said, "Is it good, friend?"

"It is bitter -- bitter," he answered;

"But I like it

Because it is bitter,

And because it is my heart."

Stephen Crane

How to Good-bye Depression

So I found this book whilst browsing Amazon, and it is one of the most unintentionally funny things I have ever seen. In case you can't tell from the photo, the title of the book is, "How to Good-bye Depression: If you constrict anus 100 times everyday. Malarkey? or Effective way?" This would be hilarious without the obvious grammatical problems stemming from faulty translation; however, the laughs don't end at the cover. Take a look at the author's notes on the back:

I think constricting anus 100 times and denting navel 100 times in succession everyday is effective to good-bye depression and take back youth. You can do so at a boring meeting or in a subway. I have known 70-year-old man who has practiced it for 20 years. As a result, he has good complexion and has grown 20 years younger. His eyes sparkle. He is full of vigor, happiness and joy. He has neither complained nor born a grudge under any circumstance. Furthermore, he can make love three times in succession without drawing out.

In addition, he also can have burned a strong beautiful fire within his abdomen. It can burn out the dirty stickiness of his body, release his immaterial fiber or third attention which has been confined to his stickiness. Then, he can shoot out his immaterial fiber or third attention to an object, concentrate on it and attain happy lucky feeling through the success of concentration.

If you don't know concentration which gives you peculiar pleasure, your life looks like a hell.

I'll tell you what makes my life look like a hell: not having read any more of this book. If Hayner doesn't have the means to get this gem for my peculiar pleasure, you can rest assured that I will be dropping fifteen dollars on it. Fifteen dollars is a small price to pay for learning the ability to to shoot out my immaterial fiber (which, incidentally, has been confined to my stickiness), concentrate on it, and attain happy lucky feeling through the success of concentration.

As you can see, I have nothing to say that can add to the hilarity of this remarkable specimen of pseudo-scientific literature. I'm looking forward to indulging in Sai Nishigaki's methodologies (if not their practice). On a side note, my book recommendations from Amazon should be interesting in the coming days. I'll let you know what enters my inbox (get your mind out of the gutter).

Until then, I'm all in.

Enough Is Never Quite Enough. What's Enough?

This week has reminded me just how full my life and schedule become during the academic year. I'm taking two graduate courses at SIUE, teaching three courses at LCCC, pulling shots at 222 Artisan Bakery, tending bar at the Rotten Apple, and for some reason I decided to start tutoring at the Study Skills Desk that opened up this semester. I can see my time at the Apple coming to a rather abrupt end, especially after the night I had last Saturday. The only reason I'm still there is because it's just too hard to pass up the opportunity to make a couple hundred dollars in a night while drinking great beer for free and socializing.

Tonight was also the reinstatement of Family Fun Night. Family Fun Night is on Thursdays, and it is something Tara and I do with the kids during the school year. Basically we set aside time to do some fun activity (whether it's inside or outside the home). This makes sure we get some quality recreational time in while we are all so busy. Skylar has a lot going on during the school year too with piano, violin, Girl Scouts, etc., and Tara is always busy with the house and the kids. Tonight we just went to the Mills to do some clothes shopping. We got Skylar some things, and she rode the carousel in the food court. We also managed to pick up both kids' Halloween costumes two months early. This is incredibly uncharacteristic of us. Normally we spend the week or two before the holiday scrambling for ideas. The girls ate Hibachi-San, and I saved myself for Lion's Choice. Typically we try to spend more time emphasizing the "fun" in Family Fun Night. Tonight might seem ho-hum to an outside party, but it is mostly about spending time together--something we don't get the opportunity to do nearly as often as we would like.

I have a lot to do this evening, but I have a feeling that I will spend the rest of my short time awake watching horrible television programming such as Jersey Shore while reading my latest acquisition from the library: Brandon Sanderson's Warbreaker. I was going to jump into the Mistborn trilogy, but I have little enough time for recreational reading as it is. I don't need to start a trilogy, especially when Towers of Midnight and Way of Kings are coming out so soon. I'll get to Mistborn soon enough. As for now, I will be wearing out multiple highlighters on composition and rhetoric scholarship with the occasional welcome foray into Sanderson's most recent fantasy world. If you couldn't tell, I'm kind of a fanboy.

Gorgeous Gorges and Gorging

Despite being slightly hung over, Saturday in Portland was a blast. We rented a van and took it up the scenic highway to the Columbia River Gorge. As the cliche goes, a picture is worth a thousand words, so I posted a few on Facebook to make up for my lack of motivation to do any sort of descriptive writing. You will have to go there if you want to see them since Blogger sucks at uploading images.

After our scenic tour, we swung by Voodoo Donuts to pick up some dessert. Its reputation had preceded it, and it did deliver a tasty donut with a hip shtick. Leaving the donuts in the van for after dinner, we headed into my favorite place we visited the entire trip: Hopworks Urban Brewery. Normally I wouldn't take my family to a brewpub for dinner, but this one was different. One of their largest dining areas is custom-made for families as it was decked out with chalkboards, toys, books, and plenty of other things for kids to do. There was even organic baby food on the menu for Dexter. HUB uses natural, organic, locally-grown ingredients in their food and beer. They also made much of their building and decorum out of recycled and reused materials. The bar featured a multitude of bicycle frames, and they even have a modified bicycle that carries two kegs and serves customers wherever they are. Oddly enough, my favorite part of the building was the bathroom. The designers ingeniously mounted bicycle seats above the urinals for patrons to rest their heads on while they do their business. Any man reading this can appreciate that.

I ordered the sampler to drink because I wanted to sample as many beers as possible without getting drunk. I was with the family after all. I didn't take any notes on the brews, but I enjoyed all but two or three out of the near-dozen placed before me. The IPA was good (I had had it before as a gift from the Ev), but I think the best was their Survival Seven-Grain Stout. On the nose were tons of espresso and roasted malts as well as some chocolate and hops. The beer had a fantastic mouth feel with all of the flavors in the nose represented. The hops and the espresso did a good job of coming out. I expected a much more malty brew but was pleasantly surprised at its bitterness. At only 5.3% ABV, I would drink this all day no matter the weather.

For dinner I ordered a calzone, Tara got a Greek salad, and Skylar got a hamburger. All of them were better than average, but I have to say that my calzone was the topper. It was literally an entire pizza folded in half and covered in tomato sauce and fresh basil. I was in heaven, but it was too big to eat in one sitting. I finished half of it at dinner, and a few of us finished off the other half while we played Trivial Pursuit back at the house that night. All in all, it was a pretty nice little Saturday.

Because It's Friday...

So Friday was my Portland tap room tour courtesy of Emn Bahers, and it was fantastic. I got to drink so many beers that are just unavailable in the IL-MO bi-state area, and I did not even begin to scratch the surface. Even if Tara and I didn't love this city and have other reasons to come back, I would want to come back to delve into the city's amazing beer offerings.

After a good Mexican dinner at home, the Ev and I caught a bus downtown. The public transportation infrastructure is so good there that I imagine the DUI statistics are fairly low. I know we were glad by the end of the evening that we didn't have to drive. We started out at Deschute's Brewery.

Deschutes had a cool tap room with a lot of wood carvings. The bar was a little cramped, but it was Friday night after all. Luckily Evan and I managed to get two bar seats right away. We ordered up a sampler tray so that we could try as many beers as possible without getting belligerently drunk. In our flight was Cascade Ale, Inversion IPA, Obsidian Stout, Alma NWPA, Hop in the Dark Cascadian Dark Ale, and Fresh Squeezed IPA. The Cascade Ale was the total definition of a session beer. At 4.5% ABV, it was light but with enough of a hop character to make me want to keep drinking it. The Inversion IPA was a decent IPA and is more of what I consider a session beer for myself (anything under 7% for me, this one clocking in at 6.8%). It was a typical Northwest IPA: citrusy and crisp. The Obsidian Stout was one that I wish I could have tried from a bottle. The carbonation was off, but it seemed as if it might have held some promise. The Alma NWPA (North West Pale Ale) seemed as if it would have been better with food than a stand-alone pint. It was well balanced which is something that I look for in a beer if I am eating while I drink it. Regardless, I think it could have benefited from more of a hop character, but that could just be the hop head in me. I liked the Hop in the Dark Cascadian Dark Ale. As the name hinted at, the concept was kind of like a shot in the dark (a shot of espresso in a cup of coffee). The beer was very dark in color which suggested a malty brew, but it was absolutely loaded with hops. The dark malts balanced out the hops well, and it sat at around 70 IBUs. With a great hop flavor and 6.9% ABV, I could drink this beer all night. As much as I liked this one, I liked the next even better. The Fresh Squeezed IPA was just what the name suggested. It was a total citrus bomb with a wet-hopped flavor that generally only comes around harvest time. At 60 IBUs and 6.5% ABV, I wish I could have sat around a bit longer and tried the cask of it they had that evening. As it was, I'm glad the one full pint (or snifter rather) that I drank was the Hop Henge Batch 8. Tons of Northwest hops gave this imperial IPA a complex taste and aroma. This was definitely not a session beer, and it was a good one to finish our visit with. I was able to walk off its effects by the time we got to our next destination. All told, Deschutes had a decent establishment and some pretty decent beers. They reminded me of a slightly better Schlafly of Portland: decent brews with the occasional gem.

Our next stop was Bailey's tap room, and we liked it so much that we decided to forgo three other visits that were planned for the evening. Bailey's had twenty taps, one of which was a beer that I had just been telling Evan how much I enjoy on our walk over: Dogfish Head's Festina Peche. Festina Peche is one of my absolute favorite beers. It is a neo-Berliner Weiss (my second-favorite style of beer next to IPA) and is infused with peaches although the fruit is very subtle in both the aroma and flavor. It is slightly sweet, more tart, and perfectly refreshing. It also sits at only 4.5% which makes it the perfect session beer. Even when we had samplers or other beers in front of us, I always had a pint of this that I was drinking.

Our sampler consisted of Green Flash Le Freak, Natian Hint o' Mint, Caldera Mogli, Laughing Dog Rocket Dog, and Oakshire Perfect Storm. Two of these can be dismissed, two were tasty mostly because of their novelty (but good nevertheless), and one was fan-damn-tastic. The Rocket Dog and Perfect Storm were not so great. Rocket Dog was a rye IPA, but it paled in comparison--no pun intended--to others in the same category such as Founder's Red's Rye and Lenny's R.I.P.A. I might be being too harsh on the Perfect Storm because I don't remember it too much, but that alone tells me I must not have thought much of it if I didn't even take notes on it. The Green Flash Le Freak was one I had had before, but I wanted the Ev to try it. It is a very exact combination of Belgian trippel and West Coast IPA. I cannot give it a better description. You probably haven't had a beer like it, but you should. Your palate deserves it. The Natian Hint o' Mint was interesting. It was not a misnomer. It was a pale ale with a hint of mint--not something I would want to drink a lot of, but the three-ounce glass was enough to tell us it was tasty. The Caldera Mogli was the one beer (besides the Festina Peche) that kept us at Bailey's. Caldera makes a good canned IPA, but I had no idea they were capable of such a fantastic beer. Mogli is an imperial porter, and it is everything I want in a dark and stout beer. The aroma tells you what you are getting into right away: chocolate, espresso, vanilla, and even a bit of tobacco and cherries for good measure. It rivals Founder's Breakfast Stout, and coming from me, that is saying something. We finished our time at Bailey's by barely playing one of their many selections of board games, instead talking and laughing like we unfortunately don't get to do as often as we both would like.

Realizing the time, we quickly paid our tab so we could make the bus to our final destination of the evening. Evan and Kristen have the fortune of living a very short walk from a great public house of Lompoc Brewery's. We made it just in time for last call of food and alcohol. We quickly ordered two pints of their excellent imperial pale ale which is labeled C-Note because it is filled with Crystal, Cluster, Cascade, Chinook, Centennial, Columbus, and Challenger hops. At 100 IBUs, it packs a punch. We also decided to indulge in the largest portion of their most popular sampler. The aptly-named Tater Totchoes were a heaping pile of fried tater tots covered in cheese, tomatoes, jalapenos, black olives, onions, salsa, and sour cream. The image above does not do it justice. We made short work of it as by that time we were both ravenous and a little tipsy. While we were eating, the bartender (who happened to randomly be from Caseyville, IL) brought us some "dessert beers." All I remember is one was called Hoppily Ever After and the other was dark. My palate was shot after the totchoes and night on the town.

After the short walk back to the apartment, we cracked open a couple Session Blacks from Full Sail and watched an episode of the wonderfully funny new FX series Louie. Louis C.K. is one of the funniest (and most vulgar) comedians you will ever encounter, and you are doing yourself a disservice if you don't check him and his show out.

Now that I have sufficiently bored you with my geekiness (this time pertaining to beer), I must rest. Tomorrow I hope to tell you all about all the fun we had on Saturday seeing the natural beauty of Oregon and visiting Hopworks Urban Brewery. I also hope to have some pictures up. So, as always,

I'm all in.

Two More Oregon Brews

Besides the Ev's homebrews last night, we cracked open two other Oregon brews. One was from Full Sail, and the other was from Captured by Porches. I wasn't terribly impressed by either, but they were both drinkable.

The Full Sail beer was their aptly-named Session Black. Instead of the Schwarzbier that it is, it reminded me more of a very light porter. It had a smoky, toasted malt with a very slight coffee bitterness. I didn't get a good nose on it because I didn't pour it out of its stubby eleven-ounce bottle. It was not mislabeled as it is a decent session beer if one is desiring the style it offers. I have had nothing but bad beer from Full Sail in the past, so this one was a pleasant surprise.

The brew from Captured by Porches was their Invasive Species IPA. I would have had a better opinion of this beer if it didn't try to pass itself off as an IPA. I don't know about you, but when I think IPA, I think hops. This beer did not have a hop character to speak of, representing instead a biscuity malt finish. It wasn't like it was bad--it just wasn't what I would consider good IPA. If they would have simply called it a pale ale, I wouldn't have been so harsh on it; however, I would drink this beer again with lunch or dinner. I have a feeling it would go good with food.

Tonight I will try to take notes on all of the brews the Ev and I are going to indulge in. I can't promise much as I imagine the evening will degenerate eventually. I know we are going to at least seven tap rooms.

I can't wait.

Homebrewed

Tonight I got to drink one of the Ev's homebrews for the third time. The first that I sampled was earlier in the year. It was a stout, and I was pleasantly surprised at its quality. After all, you never know what someone's first homebrew is going to taste like. This one was a little sweet with a roasted malt and a smoky caramel finish. It was very drinkable without a heavy mouth feel, and I made short work of the two he left at my house.

The second beer of his that I tried was last night. As I said in my previous post, it was a single-hopped IPA made with strictly Chinook hops. It had a rich, citrusy aroma. The taste definitely delivered although it was not overpowering at all. It would be a great session IPA. I could definitely drink three or four of them and still want another. This second offering was even more impressive than the first, and not only because I am a bigger fan of the style. I'm actually much more critical of IPAs because I'm such a fan of them.

Tonight Evan broke out the big boy: a twenty-two ounce double IPA. I'm pretty judgmental about my IPAs, and I am even more so about my doubles. I'm not going to lie; I was a little worried even though the other two were very solid. There is more to a double IPA than loading it with hops (even though that is an integral part). It can be tough to get a well-balanced and drinkable beer when you throw over two pounds of hops into a five-gallon batch. Evan poured us a couple near-pints, and I shoved my nose in the glass. As expected, the brew had a pungent aroma: floral and full of citrus. The most prevalent flavor on first taste was Centennial hops. Citrus and pine were balanced by a nice toasted malt that made the beer go down almost too easily. At around ten percent alcohol, my glass was gone a little too quickly, but not so quick that I didn't notice the excellent head retention the beer had.

I've been wanting to get into brewing for quite awhile now, but the up-front expense of equipment has kept me from diving into the hobby. Now I'm a bit more hesitant because Evan has set the bar kind of high. He has one or two more varieties that I have yet to try (as well as a fridge full of local beers that I can't wait to tell you about). Tomorrow night we are hitting the town for a brewery tour that will test our palates as much as our livers. I imagine you'll have to wait until late Saturday or Sunday for an update on that front. I don't plan on being a very trig cove following tomorrow evening if ya kin (fellow Dark Tower fans will understand that last part a bit better, but I imagine you can catch my meaning via context). Until next time...

I'm all in.

Travel Woes

We are finally in Portland, mostly rested from the hellish day we had yesterday. I don't want to discourage anyone with small children from traveling, but it is an arduous process.

The first part of the day went swimmingly. We've become pretty proficient with packing and traveling from Lambert. It started going bad after we landed at LAX. After getting off the plane, we had to take a shuttle from one terminal to another if we wanted to avoid going through security again. The shuttle port was a tiny, chair-lined, parallelogram-shaped room on the level of the tarmac. There was an argument going on between a desk clerk and one of the dumbest, most stubborn individuals I have ever encountered--and I've encountered a few in my days of customer service. This dipshit had neglected to depart from his shuttle with everyone else on board, had ridden back to the shuttle port, and had therefore missed his flight. His demands for a seat on a flight that did not exist did not cease the entire thirty-five minutes we waited for a shuttle. About two minutes into this fiasco, some brainless, irresponsible kid that will probably grow up to be a Congressman set off an alarm that blatted for the rest of our time there as well. To add to this cacophony, we had a ten-month-old baby boy who was hungry, tired, and uncomfortable from his four-hour flight...and we still had another two-hour flight to PDX.

Getting on our plane to PDX, we realized that the one sleep aid that Dexter has (a glowing seahorse named Charlie that plays music) was missing. He was by this time super-pissed and tired, so this was damn-near catastrophic. Tara got him to sleep after much rocking and shushing, but he didn't sleep for long. About the time he awoke, I realized that his sippy cup had leaked into his diaper bag and had soaked all of the bag's contents. Dexter proceeded to scream for the remainder of our time on the plane. Luckily we had some understanding traveling companions who had seen him being his ridiculously cute self a little earlier. Kristen picked us up at the airport and saved the day by bringing us another Charlie.

I had thought the only appropriate way to end last night was with a bullet, but I was wrong. We got settled at Kristen and The Ev's lovely apartment, and I had one of Evan's excellent homebrewed Chinook IPAs. It had a nice floral nose, and the single-hop character was refreshing without being overpowering. It didn't assault the pallet; it caressed it and told it everything was going to be okay. And everything was.

Prepping for Portland

Despite the relatively early hour and the list of things that need done before we can depart for Portland on Wednesday, my body--full of exhaustion and turtle soup--is telling me it is time for bed. This weekend took its toll on me. After opening the bakery and closing the bar on Saturday, we went to the St. Mary's picnic in Brussels on Sunday. Even though it was hot and I felt terrible, we had a good time visiting with friends and family. I made a poor showing at the all-you-can-eat family-style dinner. I'm pretty sure Skylar ate more than I did.

Today was a short and quiet day at the bakery followed by a couple hours of errands. I got in a quick nap when I got home for which I am very grateful. Tara has been getting everything ready for our trip. She works really hard keeping up with the housework and the kids and still manages to plan for every contingency. I wouldn't be able to do anything without her.

Adam is getting ready to leave for Carbondale as I type this, and Larry and Anne go back to Florida in the morning. We will miss them all, but we will see Adam briefly next week.

This post is also my test run for dlvr.it. Apparently it will send posts from my Blogger blog to my Tumblr, Facebook, Twitter, and Buzz accounts. I've been desiring such a service since I started making regular updates, so I hope it works the way I want it to.

I should probably get up and start doing something more productive. I might have something to say later, but I will more than likely fall asleep before I manage to get it down. Until next time,

I'm all in.